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MONTHLY LOOK-AHEAD – AUGUST 2017

Hello blogosphere! I’m back again, and it’s currently 11:09PM. Why am I writing a post at this time? I’m not sure, especially since I’m surviving off very little sleep after a huge TV marathon last night until 4:30AM…. I should be sleeping, but I’ve ended up here.

So what has August got in store for us? Probably nothing very eventful, since I’m not in school until September, but there’ll definitely be some littler things to look forward to!

Back to Blogging

It’s no secret that my blog has been lacking posts in the last few months, and I’ve been even more useless at reading and commenting on other bloggers’ posts. With school out of the way, I’ll have a lot more free time, and a lot less homework (although teachers had really been slacking in that department anyway this year, thankfully). I’m planning on getting way more posts out than usual!

Blolidays

If you were here last year, and I still haven’t managed to scare you away, first, thanks for staying, but more importantly, you might remember a series of posts I did last summer, called Blolidays. It’s a hybrid word of blog and holidays if you hadn’t already noticed, and although I don’t really go on holiday (thanks mother for the huge family), I write a post once a week themed on the holidays. It might be a summer playlist, my favourite clothes, a haul (that one’s coming for sure!) or even just a rant about the things I love in summer.

Brunch Outings

Like last year, my friends and I have planned to meet up a bunch of times in the holidays, and I’m hoping we actually do! Last year, it got to the last weekend of the holidays and we all got hit with “oh sugar we haven’t been out once” so ended up going out then. Regina wants to go to some little cafes for brunch a few times, and I’m a sucker for all things breakfast-y, especially smoothies!

Everything Everything

For those of you that haven’t already gathered, I’m an absolute hopeless romantic, despite never having been in a relationship or anywhere close to one – ever. It’s heartbreaking, I know, but I survive purely off romance movies: the Notebook being one of my all time favourites (even though it makes me ugly-cry so bad). This month – I think – Everything Everything comes out in the UK Cinemas, and I’m so so excited to watch it.

Teen Wolf Season 6B

As I mentioned at the beginning of this post, I was on a huge TV marathon. Now’s the time where I tell you it was Teen Wolf. I’d planned to rewatch the entire series in time for the new episode that I could watch on Monday (thank you, timezones), but by Sunday morning I was really pushing whether I’d make it in time or not. To make sure I did, I stayed up until 4:30AM. From Wednesday to Monday morning, I’d watched ninety-one episodes of Teen Wolf, which worked out to about two and a half days straight. It’s easily the biggest binge I’ve ever been on in such a short space of time, but I made it, and the new episode WAS SO EXCITING I CAN’T WAIT TO WATCH THE REST OF THE SEASON!!!

Back to School Shopping

As usual, late August comes with restocking on stationery, school uniform, shoes, and the lot. Some people find it really tedious, and a bit depressing, but since me and my friends are all dorks, it’s so exciting, and we set aside a day to go out to a bunch of stationery shops in town. There’s something so refreshing about starting a new year with a whole set of new equipment. Who knows, maybe I’ll even keep my ruler this year? I’ve never managed to keep a ruler – ever; it always seems to go missing, or snap and I end up using those triangle things in maths sets that I still don’t know what they’re used for…. If anyone knows, enlighten me!!

And that’s what’s ahead in the next month! Hopefully, we’ll have some nice weather, and be able to get some outside time! If you’re in the UK, you’ll know our summers usually last all of a three day heatwave and then we’re onto autumn. Let’s see!

See you next time 🙂

Awkwardsaurus

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2 YEAR BLOGIVERSARY

HELLO HELLO HELLO

POP THE CHAMPAGNE AND BLOW UP THE BALLOONS – IT’S MY BLOGIVERSARY.

Maybe without the champagne, though, since I’m 15. . 🙂

2 years ago today, I did a post called “Hello World“, under the name Just Average Teen Me. I know, the name is hella corny, and still to this day makes me want to curl up into a ball and be buried in a hole. Good thing I changed it then, I guess?

Anyways, after making my blog, at the age of 13, I thought it’d be a place where I had posts to write constantly, and ideas flowing heavier than Niagara Falls. If you’ve been here recently (and if any of you are actually left?) you’ll know I’m very very unorganised here… I’m crap at remembering to post, let alone finding the ideas, to put it frankly.

The first year or so, I had a tight schedule of when to post and when not to post, and sometimes that meant being up at 10:30pm (I was 13 okay that was late for a school-night) writing the most rushed and un-related-to-my-life posts I’ve ever seen. Hopefully, you’ll agree I’m past that now, and I try to blog about things that actually hold some shape or form of meaning to what’s going on with me? By the start of 2017, I’d changed my blogging alias to Awkwardsaurus. It fits me a million times better, and makes me want to cry of cringe slightly less.

I mentioned this last year, and I’ll mention it again. After starting my blog, I experienced a few panic attacks: the first in October, and a few others up until now. Without people to talk to, I wouldn’t have recovered as smoothly as I did. I took to WordPress, and told you all how I felt, what caused it, and the fears I had of something like it happening again. I couldn’t talk to anyone else about it, because I felt like they’d just brush it off and say it was nerves (a lot of people really don’t take mental health seriously). You listened, and you helped me. If you hadn’t, I’d have had all that cooped up inside, and it probably would have made my situation even worse.

Blogging has been useful to me, for all the reasons I never thought it would. I thought it’d be easy to gain readers, and have lots of comments as well as likes, but it’s more than that. When I started blogging, I had crazy issues with my self-confidence. I was terrified to even talk to teachers, ordering food or drink from a barista made me shake, and I was constantly convinced that my friends didn’t like me (kind of happened BUT THAT’S BESIDES THE POINT). Obviously, there are a bunch of other factors that played into it, but since then (2015, oh my god that sounds like so long ago) I’ve flourished into a more confident, and happier version of who I was then. Sure, standing in front of the school year still makes me blush and tremble, but I’ve started doing things for me, that I wouldn’t have been able to do before. I’ve made more friends. thanks to not being scared to go and talk to people, I’ve bought things I wouldn’t have before (menstrual cup, anyone?) and I’ve switched to a skirt for school.

If you’re thinking about starting a blog, and you haven’t done already, I can’t stress how much I think you should. Even if just a small part of you thinks it’d be fun, or a way to pass the summer (that’s why I set up this one), just go for it, set up a website here on WordPress, and I’ll be more than happy to help you out!

Anyways, thanks to everyone who’s been stuck in this for the long-haul, and to new readers, too. I know, I’m a pain to keep up with but it means the world to me.

Until next time

Awkwardsaurus

Posted in monthly look ahead, Uncategorized

MONTHLY LOOK-AHEAD: JULY 2017

HELLO HELLO HELLO

I know, we’re three days into July already but EXCUSE MY LATENESS AND LET’S GET ONTO IT BECAUSE JULY IS USUALLY HELLA EVENTFUL.

Travel Day

Every year in July, my school does a trip to Blackpool Pleasure Beach for a day, and we can go around in our own friendship groups, wear our own clothes, and basically do whatever we want. You might remember that there was an extremely attractive photographer when I went last July, and then the following November. But hey, Travel Day is always one of the best days, and it’s actually my last Travel Day since next year I’ll be on study leave!

Sponsored Walk

Another annual event at my school is the sponsored walk: everyone’s families pitch in to sponsor their kids in a walk around the countryside near school. It gets us out of an afternoon of lessons, and it’s a great time to chill out and chat to your friends! Plus, we’ll be in our own clothes!

Summer Holidays

On July 21st (it’s quite late this year) our school will break up for the summer. Year 10 will be over. I’ll probably do a big post on it like I think I did last year? But as much as I’ll miss the people I usually see everyday, it’ll be great to sleep in every morning!

My Blogiversary

July 27th is the day I created my blog. Two whole years ago! At the time, I went by Just Average Teen Me, which I ended up switching for my current name earlier in the year. A Blogiversary is a great way to look back on what’s happened in the span of a year, and this year has definitely had a lot going on!

The Great Gatsby

A few weeks ago, I watched the film starring Leonardo DiCaprio, and it quickly became one of my favourites. Since then, I’d been set on getting my hands on the book, by F. Scott Fitzgerald. Last Saturday, I managed to find it in WH Smith’s (thank you WH Smith’s, you beat Waterstones this time) for £6.99 and I’m currently 3 chapters in. I’m loving it so far and I can’t wait to read the rest!

Everything Everything 

I know, the film came out sometime last month I think, but I haven’t managed to get out and see I yet. As the hopeless romantic that I am, I absolutely love romance movies. They melt my heart, and usually end in a good few tears. This month, I plan to watch it, and I’ll let you know what i think!

And those are the main things in store for this month! See you around 🙂

Awkwardsaurus

Posted in Uncategorized

Hold On to Friendship


Have you ever tasted tears saturated with makeup? It’s a slightly bitter, soap-like tinge, that I had never encountered until last week’s Wednesday. How I got there? Well that’s what this post is for.

Before we begin, it’s definitely useful to list all the significant people I’ll need to be mentioning.

The girl half of my friendship group: me, Britt, Penny, Hayley, Rachel, Regina.

The guy half: Tyler, Theo, Ryder, Elliot, Sam. 

Others from another group: Megan (Elliot’s girlfriend) and Alysha. 

Since October, there’s been a slightly romantic awkwardness between Rachel and Elliot, which wound up with him plucking up the courage to ask her out twice, and be rejected twice. Mind you, the only reason Rachel didn’t say yes was because she was scared. 

Flash forward to early February, and Elliot starts dating Megan. Rachel was pretty destroyed, and I made a little post on it, called Lessons of Love. 

Since then, Elliot has been spending some of his time with Megan’s group, and some with our group, so that he can balance the two. This all seems swell if you ask me, but according to my friends, he’s leaving us. Not to mention the rather strong dislike they’ve built up against Megan since.

A few months on, to last Saturday, Ryder was out at a birthday meal for Alysha with Megan, Elliot, and the rest of the people from that friendship group. On the group chat with Penny, Rachel, Regina and myself, there was a lot of speculation over whether Ryder was dating (or about to be dating) Alysha. Jumping too quickly to conclusions, Rachel took to the full group chat (everyone in our group) with a screenshot of a Wikipedia page for “Judas the Betrayer”. 

The next few school days were packed with a good bit of persistent teasing, and by Tuesday, Ryder had decided to stay with Elliot, Megan, Alysha and their group at break times. Since Theo and Tyler were helping out around school, that left the girls and Sam. Sam clearly felt a little awkward about it, and wound up heading towards the other guys by Wednesday. 

In RE (religious education), Penny, Britt, Rachel and Regina had decided to start afresh, and wipe free the guys because they were abandoning us. They were completely done with the friendship, and had told us all to leave the group chat. They even went to the extent of reintroducing themselves as the new boy-free girls that they were. 

Since the guys are actually some of my longest friends (Elliot was the first person i spoke to in high school, and one of my only friends throughout Year 7), the whole situation was hurting my heart quite a lot, so I engrossed myself in the work we were doing, and kept my opinions to myself.

The bus drive home was havoc, as always on a school bus, but as soon as I’d made it home and closed the door to my bedroom, everything I’d felt all day started pouring out – literally, from my eyes. They welled up slightly at first, and then the tears just didn’t stop. Losing some of my best friends because they think I’m against them (especially when I’m completely the opposite) was heartbreaking to think about, and I was a literal mess. 

It was then that I tasted the tears. Bitter and soapy. I looked in the mirror, and saw the nude coloured drops, meandering down, around my nose and either dropping off my chin or landing on my lips. I hadn’t washed off my makeup yet, and my under eye concealer was definitely not waterproof.

After ignoring hundreds of messages from the girls, begging me to leave the chat, I took to Instagram and created a new group. Me, Ryder, Sam and Elliot. I told them everything, about how I don’t hate them, how I really didn’t want to lose any friends and that I thought the girls were all being unreasonable, as well as hypocritical. 

Sam instantly named the group “sane people chat” and Elliot was full of thanks that I hadn’t “jumped on the bandwagon too”. They all advised me not to mention the chat to the girls, and made sure I knew that if they “give you any shit” for talking to the guys (if they found out, that is), they’d be there.

Since then, we’ve been messaging every day to make up for barely talking in person, and I’ve really proven to myself that I’m in control of things. 

You don’t have to do what your friends say, just because there’s more of them. If you want to be friends with certain people, nobody has any right to stop you. 

I managed to keep every one of my friends, when I could easily have lost about 5. 
Losing friends over silly fallouts isn’t worth it, and it’s important to hold onto the people you care about, as well as the memories you’ve made with them.

Awkwardsaurus