Another late-night blog post – I know, it’s becoming a pattern.
You know when there’s a lot on your mind, and you kind of feel like a fizzy drink being shook up over and over again? That’s how I’m feeling at the moment, and I can’t think where else to vent about everything, since my friends are… well, we’ll get onto that at some point probably.
Where to start… What have I been up to in my extremely uneventful summer break so far? Well, I just took a break from my rather intense Warblers rave. For the uneducated folks reading, the Warblers are an a capella (no instruments) group on Glee. They’re amazing, and I think you should definitely take a little trip over to YouTube to have a peek. My favourites are Hey Soul Sister and Whistle, but there’s so many others!
In the last 5 days or so, I’ve been on a binge of Marvel films since I’d actually never seen the majority of them (I don’t know why). I’ve watched (in release order) all of the films in the same universe as Iron Man (so Thor, Captain America, Hulk, etc). It’s a lot of films to cram into such a short time, but I guess it just shows you how little I actually do with my life. 🙂
My favourite out of them all (aside from the Guardians of the Galaxy movies; I’ve loved them since they came out) would probably be Thor: The Dark World. From there, has sparked my love of Loki. Tom Hiddleston is a beautiful human as it is, but somehow the long, gelled, black hair combined with a long green cape and metal armour accelerates that. Not to mention, his humour and one-liners are hilarious, even though Drax still makes me keel over with laughter the most.
While we’re on the topic, watch this. It’s a very entertaining three minutes and sixteen seconds. 😉
Another thing that has been on my mind for some time is the idea of the future. I’m all for living in the moment and enjoying the time we have right now, but I’ll be starting Year 11 in a few weeks. As any readers in the UK will know, Year 11 is the oldest year of high school. It’s when you take your GCSEs, go to prom, have big school trips and say goodbye to everything you’ve known for the last five years as you head off to college (not university).
Truth is, I’m scared. I’m happy where I am now. Sure, my friends have their bad moods, and some lessons bore me to death, but everyone has that, right? High school has become my comfort zone but soon I’ll have a new timetable, new buildings to navigate, new friends, new group chats and new teachers. I always looked at people this age as so much older than I feel. I still feel like the same 11-year-old girl I was when I started high school, even though I’ve grown (not that much in height) so much since.
It took me so long to make friends, and finally feel like I was fitting in, and the thought of having to do that all over again is quite nerve-wracking. Fast Forward two short years after then and I’ll be going off to university, away from home, away from family, and further away from everything else that matters to me right now.
Another thing I wanted to ramble about is a current situation going on with my friends. As I’ve mentioned before, I have a group chat with Hayley, Penny and Britt. For almost the last two years, it’s been a safe place, where we can rant to each other about nearly anything that crosses our mind and nobody will get judged – at least not too much. At this point, I feel like I’m drifting away from them all, all except Hayley. Recently, it’s become a case of Penny and Britt getting annoyed with me super easily, talking about it on their own private chat, and then confronting me on the group chat.
Recently, that’s been when I messaged them about Teen Wolf. Apparently I was being “f***ing annoying” (censor for the children). What annoys me the most about that is that Penny (she said it) frequently spams us about whatever show it is that she’s watching at the time, whether it’s The Walking Dead, or Rupaul’s Drag Race and nobody has ever told her that she shouldn’t. Today, it started with a sarcastic conversation. As you’ll probably understand, it’s easy for sarcasm to be taken wrongly. At this point though, it was quite clear that I wasn’t being serious, but Penny and Britt managed to turn it against me (surprise, surprise) and then suddenly keep piling on stuff that’s been annoying them lately about me. It was almost as if they’d rehearsed it on a private chat (I know for a fact they’d spoken about it beforehand, but whether they’d planned a response, I’m not sure).
It ended up in a pretty big mess, and I said “Well, I’m sorry. I thought you guy were alright with joking like that”. Britt thanked me for the apology, but Penny replied with “Naa that isn’t an apology. It sounds so half hearted.” At that point, I got annoyed. I had already apologised for something I didn’t even need to be apologising for, and ended up throwing more sarcasm with “do you want me to write you a card and send some flowers? Hire a singer to go with it?” followed by “Look, I’m sorry and I’ve said that, just let it slide?”. She didn’t say a thing on the chat until 4 hours later, when she said that she had nothing to say because she was watching YouTube.
It’s all a bit messy. I don’t enjoy it, but I also don’t enjoy letting other people get at me for ridiculous things. So this is where I ended up. It’s currently 00:40am, so I should definitely try to get some sleep, and I’ll probably post this in the morning 😀
Editing note: I’ve just took out a few chunks since this post was ridiculously long! If you’ve read all this, thank you – you’re the best ❤