Posted in Blolidays, Uncategorized

BLOLIDAYS #6 – STATIONERY HAUL

IT’S THE LAST BLOLIDAYS POST OF THE YEAR! Hopefully you’ve been enjoying this series, since writing it has been so much fun.

This week’s post will be a look at what I bought on Thursday in preparation for the new school year! I decided not to get a few things, since some things like my pencil case and maths set were still in tact from last year. Saving money, why not?

School Bag

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I found this in wilkos, and it’s a lot less vibrant than last year’s fluorescent pink Under Armour backpack. The red leather kind of reminded me of Emma Swan’s red leather jacket in Once Upon A Time! And this was £12, reduced from £15.

Bic Pens

pen

I usually just get the normal ball point pens, but they only had those in blue or the packs with red, green, blue and black. So I opted for these, which are very similar, but have a grip, and clear lids. Can’t go to school without pens!

Staedtler Pencils

ppencil

I definitely bought these last year, and probably several times before. Staedtler are probably most of what people are buying for pencils, because they seem to be so much better quality than other pencils!

Shatterproof Ruler

ruler

I picked up the pink one, probably because it was on top of the pile (lazy, I know). I don’t usually go for full length rulers, but the folding ones always snap for me (I’ve never managed to keep one) so I ended up getting this! 😀

Highlighters

high

These are the same as the highlighters I bought last year, but I loved having a wide range of colours to chose from (especially in poetry analysis for English literature) so I got them again!

Filing Folder

Last year, I bought a blue one of these and it’s currently behind me, bulging with exam papers, revision notes, reports and so much other random stuff I’ve stuffed in there (seriously, I think my electric toothbrush instructions are in there). Since it was such a life saver, I decided to get another one for this year!

Butterfly Project Book

book

I love using notebooks for copying out notes from my school books, so the stuff I need to revise is all in one place. I’m never really a massive fan of online revision or flashcards, so revising in a notebook is definitely the way to go for me!  Not to mention, it has the little tabs on the side so you can separate the subjects!

I don’t know what to call these?

stack

I had two of these from last year (my sister had the other two) and it ended up not quite enough space for all my school books, so I picked up another set! 😀

And that’s most of what I bought this year!

Thanks again for reading and responding to this series, it’s been a lot of fun, and I guess we’ll see blolidays next year! 🙂

Awkwardsaurus

Posted in monthly look ahead, Uncategorized

MONTHLY LOOK-AHEAD: SEPTEMBER 2017

Can you believe it’s September already!? It hardly seems that long ago since New Year, and it’s been 8 months! Anyway, as always, with a new month, comes a new Monthly Look-Ahead! With a new academic year starting, a lot of these will be school-based, but I might squeeze a few other things in, too!

Year 11

For those of you that don’t already know, high schools in the UK are separated into year groups numbered 7-11. Year 7s are 11 turning 12 when they start, and year 11s are 15 turning 16. So, 4 years after starting high school, my year group are finally the oldest! I don’t feel nearly as old as the Year 11s looked when I was in Year 7, it’s gone so fast!

Senior Badges

Something that comes with starting Year 11 is senior badges. Everyone in the year group gets a little badge to pin to their blazer, and it’s kind of a way for the younger years to know that we’re the oldest, and they can come to us for questions about school and whatnot, but I like to see it as a “Well done, you’ve made it this far – only a bit more to go” kind of thing.

New Timetable

While I won’t be getting a new set of teachers (only in subjects where last year’s teachers have left), I still get a new layout for my lessons. Last year, the timetable was actually pretty good, so I’m hoping this year is as well!

College Applications

No, not university. You might call it sixth form, but it’s basically the two years before university, where you take your A-Levels. It’s a big step up from high school, and I’m definitely nervous, but in the last few days I’ve been more excited than usual!

Romance Movies

I have a few romance movies that I want to watch sometime soon. One was recommended by a friend, called ‘Before I Go’ I think, and the other is Safe Haven. I’ve seen the trailer for Safe Haven and it looks great! Let me know some of your favourites and I’ll add them to the list!

Autumn

Leaves are already starting to change colour a tiny bit, and I’m so excited for Autumn. It’s easily one of my favourite seasons, where it’s darker in the evenings, colder, prettier colours – and I get to wear my warmer clothes. Who am I kidding, I’ve been wearing hoodies all summer anyway. This year, the UK hasn’t had the best Summer, if you ask me!

That’s everything I can think of for this month! For those of you wondering, I’ll be back at school on Monday, so only 3 days to go! 😦

-Awkwardsaurus 

Posted in Uncategorized

People Need Space

Hi,

I’m Just Average Teen Me. Following Friday’s situation (to say the least), I’ve been anxious and nervous all weekend. I still have shaky knees when I walk down stairs, and I’ve been feeling sick at the thought of school on Monday… Clueless would be a good way to describe how I’m feeling about the whole thing: I don’t understand why Britt told them, and how on Earth I’m going to convince people I don’t without seeming overly defensive. :/

Anyways, that’s not what this post is about.

As soon as I got on the bus, I said on the group chat (Britt, Penny, Hayley and me) that I needed a break, and “see you on Monday.” That chat was a place where I could be totally myself, and not worry about what other people think, because they wouldn’t ever see it. Tables have turned and I’m not sure how I feel about it not being anywhere near as safe as I imagined it. Secrets get out, and I guess you could say it’s my fault for putting them in there in the first place.

Because of that, I’ve distanced myself from the chat, without a specific time I plan on being back; I don’t want to say something on there that ends up getting out again. Although I’ve muted the chat notifications, I still see the most recent message every time I go on to text Ashley. She’s been amazing with the whole dilemma, and promises to deny it if anyone finds out and asks. It’s probably good for you to know that even writing this is making me shake and shiver a little.

Usually, the messages are “JATM COME BACK” or “where the hell did Jatm go?”. If you ask me, I think it’s a slight invasion of privacy, when I quite clearly stated that I needed a break.

And that’s the main point of this post.

When people need a break from reality, don’t push them to come back. 

By prying, you might feel like you’re getting closer to that person, but  they’re stepping back further and further every time. Eventually, it’ll be harder for them to come back.

Space and time are vital to get your thoughts straight for some people, and disrespecting that, whether you realise it or not, could just add to the anxiety that they’re already feeling and force a distance between the two of you. Please, if there’s someone you know that has asked for space, just give it to them. Chances are, for them to have asked for space, they must really need it.

Think of it as a round-about – those spinny things in playgrounds? Maybe their round-about has gone spinning, and they’re getting dizzier and dizzier until they can’t think straight. The logical thing to do is to sit still, and relax. But if other people try getting onto that round-about while they’ve just started to get it under control, it’ll wobble, and it might even start spinning again. Don’t be the person that makes them lose that control again…

On that note, that’s the end of today’s post. I know, I posted yesterday, but I needed to get some thoughts out into the open, and it’s safe to say that it’s helped significantly. Thanks so much for reading; if you didn’t, I’d really have nobody to talk to about this ❤

Just Average Teen Me

 

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It Happened Again

Hi,

I’m Just Average Teen Me. If you’re wondering what I mean by ‘it’, I mean a few things actually. First off: people betraying my trust, and second: panic attack. For my newer readers, I had a panic attack in October 2015, and since then it’d only been minor shake-ups. Well, today that changed. And I’m pretty freaking terrified to say the least.

I’ll take you through everything that’s happened today, so I can set the scene and let you know what caused it and whatnot.

Everything was completely fine until French, at about 12:00. To be specific, it got a whole lot better, because I ended up with 100% on a vocabulary test which is pretty cool. A (freaking annoying, I might add) guy in my French who sits across the classroom shouted my name, asking what I got. I told him. It was right then that today became the worst day this year, if not in the last two years.

“Britt told me who you like”

Obviously, my first thought was, ‘she would never’, so I said to him “She doesn’t even know.” You’ll probably know, that was a lie. She knows about Flynn. So, this guy proceeds to say that he knows, and then says “Do you want me to whisper across the classroom?” and I told him I’d rather he didn’t. He ignored.

Cupping his mouth, he lip-synced his name: first and last. Britt had told him, and I had no idea why. Of all the people to tell, he’s one of the worst. I said “I promise you, I don’t” and turned back around to my work, refusing to turn around again. Gradually, I could feel my whole face burning up, and I was completely freaking out on the inside. From there, I went into rebound chatty mode, where I talked insane amounts and about anything I possibly could to anyone I could. My knees were shaking and I was completely terrified, but I couldn’t show it.

Lunch time rolls on, and I went to find Britt and Hayley. The first actual sentence I said was “I’m going to kill you.” which may seem a little harsh, but I guess it was a little sarcastic. She played the ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about’ until I said the guy she told’s name – then she turned around and laughed. Laughed. 

Turns out, she told at least 5 other people. He came up in conversation in one of her lessons, and she told the people in her group. From there, she was talking about how “it doesn’t really matter”; “they don’t care” and “why do you care what they think anyway?”. I told her that it really wasn’t okay. As soon as they (Penny and Britt) found out Flynn even existed, I made them both swear to secrecy. Both of them have betrayed that, and it’s pretty safe to say that I’m trusting neither of them ever again.

As soon as I got off the bus, and began to walk home, I felt my breathing pick up, and by the time I got upstairs, into the bathroom and had a drink, I was more than convinced I was about to throw up. I wound up pacing around my bedroom (there’s only enough space for about three steps until reaching a wall or my bed). It was then that I realised I was having a panic attack. Tears were brewing at my eyes, all moisture in my mouth disappeared, my throat felt like it was closing, my whole body was shaking and shivering with cold sweats, my balance was pretty bad (although the pacing probably didn’t help it) and my stomach was still churning. It lasted about 15 minutes, which is shorter than the one in October, but the feeling of dread was just as bad – if not worse.

Distinctly,  remember saying “stop it” and “woman up” over and over, begging it to go away as I trembled, but it didn’t do much. I was biting my finger and gripping at my trouser leg. Babysitting my two-year-old brother while drinking excessive amounts of water helped to send it away, partly because I didn’t want him to see me cry.

I’ve just got off facetime with Ashley, who told me not to worry, although I’m pretty sure I have some reason to… I’m still terrified and I really don’t want to go back to school on Monday… Have you ever been in a similar situation?

BYE! 😀

Just Average Teen Me

Posted in Uncategorized

44 Crush Things

Hi,

I’m Just Average Teen Me. As you might remember me saying about a month ago, I’ve sort of developed a crush on someone in my year, so I thought it would be fun to share some of the things and emotions (because they’re all over the place) that come with infatuation. ❤

  1. Realising you have a crush and feeling the mixture of excitement and “oh snap what is this”
  2. Telling someone about it, and fearing for your life for the first few weeks of them knowing
  3. Watching romance films and slowly dying (The Notebook and A Walk to Remember are two of my favourites. Both will more than likely make you cry, so if you’re watching them, get the tissues ready!)
  4. Social media stalking (who doesn’t?)
  5. Sending your friends on undercover missions to follow request them on Instagram
  6. And then subtly asking for their photos (okay, I know, I’m creepy)
  7. Beating yourself up because he’s  a popular guy that you’ve never even spoken to and this whole crush is completely superficial
  8. Googling quotes about crushes and reading through them until you reach the end of Google
  9. Convincing yourself you don’t have a crush on them, but then seeing them in person and YUP DEFINITELY STILL HAVE A CRUSH
  10. Forever wishing you had lessons with them
  11. And then finding out that one of your friends spends several hours a week next to them in lessons (the jealousy is real)
  12. Going to bed wishing that you dream about them
  13. That rush of adrenaline walking past them, sweaty hands and a pounding heart
  14. Taking any and all evidence that they aren’t as bad as they seem
  15. Begging for details when your friends spoke to them
  16. “HE OFFERED YOU HIS BLAZER?!” (I’m not kidding this actually happened. He bottle flipped, ended up drenching Hayley, and then offered her his blazer. *swoons*)
  17. Walking around where they hang out
  18. Finding out that he’s in a lesson next door to you, and finding out by looking through a door (it’s a clear door between two classrooms) and seeing him right there (sudden panic amiright?)
  19. Genuinely not knowing whether him seeing you is a good thing or not, because you look like a potato but he’d know you exist… Dilemmas
  20. Finding yourself smiling and then realising you’re thinking of him
  21. Giggling at random points in conversation when he’s brought up
  22. And trying not to when you’re with people that don’t know that you like him
  23. Always having a specific song for every new crush
  24. That look your friends give you when he enters the room
  25. And the look you give back willing them to shut up
  26. But still trying to glance at them every now and then
  27. Accidental eye contact and literally dying
  28. The Crush Song. If you haven’t heard it, let me enlighten you (it’s at the end of the list)
  29. Convincing yourself that you aren’t doing your hair differently for him, it’s for you
  30. Your friends find the whole situation rather hilarious. Britt once burst out laughing because Flynn was looking into our maths room… :/
  31. The blushing 😮
  32. Stalking on social media even more
  33. Crush playlists
  34. Critiquing the things they do like you’re their mother
  35. The relief of seeing them drinking Lucozade instead of alcohol like the rest of their friends
  36. Wondering what they’re doing right now
  37. Telepathically trying to make them think of you
  38. When you think he’s single and you become Katniss volunteering for the Hunger Games
  39. If you could feel my pulse right now, it would hit you like a sledgehammer (jams)
  40. Looking forward to Monday because school is the only place you see them
  41. And feeling so disappointed when they aren’t in
  42. When they haven’t seen your amazing Snapchat yet (I don’t know Snapchat terminology, nor do I actually have it on my phone, but I know that Penny deals with this all the time)
  43. Cute song lyrics ❤
  44. Thanking his parents for giving him a common name so my friends can’t guess which ‘Flynn’ it is 😉

And that’s everything! I hope you enjoyed reading, and could relate to some of these!

HAPPY CRUSHING!

Just Average Teen Me

Posted in Uncategorized

School? Bring It On

Hi,

I’m Just Average Teen Me. I know, I’m really not following any blogging schedules the last few days, with missing two posts and then firing two others one day after each other. And then probably the day after tomorrow? I have a bunch of posts I need to write!

Slowly tip-toeing back onto the topic of this post, as you may or may not remember (did I even tell you?), I’m going back to school tomorrow. Sure as hell it’s nice to have six whole weeks to do whatever I want, but that normally consists of binge watching entire YouTube channels or TV box sets in my bed. Seriously, I haven’t moved very much at all in the last month, hence the terribly aching legs I had after shopping for hours a few days ago. Shop till you drop – literally. 

Again, back on topic. Preparation-wise, I’ve definitely waited until the very last minute to have everything ready and actually bought: I have a jumper to pick up from ASDA (kind of like Walmart) later today, and everything else was either bought yesterday or the day before. Having said that, though, I feel really organised, and ready. Probably because it didn’t actually take that long to find everything. Four days is probably a record for me! Especially with shoes… don’t get me started on choosing school shoes! 😀

As I go back through the white framed doors of long assemblies and running out of glue sticks (every freaking year I swear the teachers just use all the school’s money for themselves), I want to keep the attitude that I have at the moment. More than likely, by mid October I’ll be praying for a break, but let’s just pretend I won’t be.

Last school year was by far my favourite of all my years at high school. Probably because I’ve finally got myself a friendship group where I don’t feel inadequate or too quirkyBritt and Penny have been the bestest friends evvverrrrrr (except Bob but he doesn’t go to the same school *cries*), from our ridiculous midnight WhatsApp chats to definitely not following around people at all. I promise we don’t. Well, we don’t follow him. We just coincidentally end up in similar places. I’m pretty sure I’ve spoken about that before? Yeah I have!

So, this year I want to be more involved. I’m hoping to talk to more people, get outside more often, make new friends, keep old friends and still do well in school on top of all of that. In a way, I’ve already started part of that. My slightly younger (by two and a half years) sister and I will be going to an outside of school thing. It’s called St John’s Ambulance, where we’ll learn First Aid, and stuff like that. It looks really good on CVs, especially if you’ll be applying to anything where First Aid or medical knowledge would be useful! I haven’t been yet, but it starts on Tuesday, so I might update you all via my Twitter.

I’ll be a Peer Mentor next year too, which is basically a guidance person for the Year 7s just starting school. We sit in their forms and help them with day to day issues that they might be dealing with, from stress with balancing homework to finding which room to go to for their lessons. I’M SO EXCITED FOR THAT BECAUSE THEY’LL THINK I’M OLD! Although they changed the room numbers a few years ago and I still have no clue what they are now…..

And, after choosing what I’m doing for GCSEs, I no longer have to do the lessons that I really do not like whatsoever! NO MORE SPANISH OR HISTORYYYYYYYYYYYY!

Here’s to a year of stepping out of my comfort zone. Letting loose (no partying for goodness sake, just being a bit less stressed). Organising to the max. And just appreciating the time that I have.

BYE! 😀

Just Average Teen Me

 

Posted in monthly look ahead, Uncategorized

Monthly Look-Ahead – SEPTEMBER 2016

Hi,

I’m Just Average Teen Me. August is about to come to a close, which means it’s nearly September! I really don’t feel like it should be, though. This year is going so insanely fast! Anyway, as you’ll probably know, I do a Monthly Look-Ahead at the end of every month. This month, it’ll be quite school-themed, with back to school and all that jazz. But let’s get into it anyway!

Back to School

For people in the UK, we’re just about to go back to school. Sure, it means there’ll be piles of school books against that wall of my room that’s been pleasantly empty for the last seven weeks, but I’ve missed my friends. I’ve missed having the goals to strive towards. I’ll do a whole post on school tomorrow, but for now, just know I’m pretty excited!

Once Upon A Time Season 6

If you’ve read quite a few of my blog posts, you’ve probably come across “Once Upon A Time” or as I may have referred to it: “OUAT”. After the several month hiatus, season 6 will return on September 25th, although I’ll be watching it on the 26th; UK friends where you at? If you haven’t seen OUAT, I’ll briefly explain it (it’s actually really difficult so I’ll just go to Season 1). All of the fairytale characters (Cinderella, Snow White, Prince Charming and the rest) are all living happily in the Enchanted Forest, when The Evil Queen casts a curse and they’re all living in our world, without a clue of their ‘fictional’ identities. It’s probably easier if you just Google it or something! 😀

New Timetable

With the start of every school year, we get a new timetable. I’m trying not to describe too much in just this post, so that I’m not completely repeating myself in tomorrow’s post. There’s something so refreshing about having a new schedule to follow; like a fresh start – a clean slate. Plus, we get to leave behind our teachers from last year and get some new ones! 🙂

Looking after Year 7s

If you didn’t already know, I’m just going into Year 10 now (bombshell dropping here, I know. But other anonymous bloggers do it, don’t they? Please don’t hunt me down.). As one of the older years, we help with the Year 7s (newcomers, for those of you that aren’t in a UK high school). It normally includes going to some of their classes, and helping them… I’m really not that sure. Anyways, I remember seeing the older years as so much bigger when I was in Year 7. And to think that this year’s Y7s will see me like that, is insaaaane. I do plan to take advantage (in a good way, of course) of that, because it isn’t very often that I feel older than the people around me. XD

Seeing My Friends Again

Aside from going into the town centre with my ‘Squad that I don’t actually hang out with at lunches anymore but I’m still in it and we’re still all great friends’ yesterday, I haven’t seen any of my other friends (trust me, there aren’t that many others) in over a month. Thanks to WhatsApp, I’ve been keeping in touch literally every minute with Penny and Britt, so we weren’t utterly separated.

Surprising Said Friends With My Brace-less Teeth

So, about two weeks ago, I parted with my braces. Parts of my teeth hadn’t seen the light of day for three whole years, so as you can imagine, they felt (and looked) very odd. At first, I was convinced I looked like a horse, but I’m pretty much used to it now, thank goodness. Penny, Rachel, Ashley and Regina have already seen them, but Britt hasn’t. She doesn’t even know I’ve had them off. I’m not sure if she’ll notice straight away, but I think she’ll be quite shocked when she does 😀

Trying Out My New Concealer

While I was out yesterday, I bought a new concealer; my Collection Lasting Perfection one ran out. Don’t get me wrong, I loved that concealer, and it works wonders when you need it to. But the one downside was that it seemed to be a little drying on the skin. I’m not sure if anyone else that’s used it has dealt with that, or if it’s just me. Anyway, I was looking for something that might be a little better in that department, when I found the Bourjois Radiance Reveal concealer – and in my shade! It claims to correct, illuminate and hydrate for 24 hours. If that doesn’t sound like the whole package, I don’t know what does! I haven’t tried it out yet, but I will be doing as soon as I’m back to school!

That’s most of what I’m looking forward to in September! What are you doing next month?

BYE! 😀

Just Average Teen Me

P.S. I had a lot of fun writing this post, for no apparent reason, but hey, thought I’d let you know! 🙂